when the dark days come

i'm not quite sure that i have words for this post...

but it happened and it's on my heart, so here goes:

last wednesday, our school went into code red lockdown

my very worst nightmare as a teacher

i guided 31 eighth graders into my back storage closet, locked the classroom door and prayed that it wasn't real.

we waited in that little closet, shoulder to shoulder for an hour before three police officers showed up with rifles

i don't know that i even responded when the officer asked me if everyone was okay.

all i knew was that i was looking at three of the biggest guns i'd ever seen and the only thing between them and my students was me.

and the only thing between me and the guns was a teeny tiny baby, just weeks away from making his or her entrance to the world

deep breath.

we're okay.

that's what i kept telling the kids.

but to tell you the truth....i had no idea how big this was.

we had heard that there were two deaths in the building, but also heard reports that everyone was okay.

there were dozens of police officers searching our building, helicopters overhead, doctors and nurses on standby at the hospital and 2 SWAT teams ready to go if we needed them.

oh, Lord...could this really happen here, at our school?

after another hour in the closet and passing out buckets to kids who said they were going to throw up, the police finally returned and escorted us to the bathrooms, saying they were positive that everything was going to be fine and that we had no threat in the building.

deep breath....we're okay....another half hour and all students had been sent home

the staff was met by our principal and a police officer who confirmed that the call made to 911 was a "hoax" and that we were never in any real danger.

i called my husband, picked up my girls and begged the Lord for joy...heaps and heaps of overflowing joy

because i may not know a lot about a lot of things, but what i DO know is that anxiety gets me nowhere.

joy gets me to the heart of Jesus and that's where i needed to be on wednesday....and thursday

because on thursday i walked with that same group of 8th graders to the hockey arena when our principal came over the loudspeaker to announce we were evacuating the building due to a bomb threat

an hour at the ice arena and we were bussed back to school, assured again that we were safe

dozens of news reports and media crews later, we finally, blessedly, had a quiet, normal day on friday

and today, these showed up at the office from the parents of one of my 8th graders...

thanking me for staying calm

i know that there are lots of parents and kids who are worked up about what happened at our school last week

and i can't blame them

but when all is said and done, i know that no matter what else is taken from us, we always have an option

fear or hope

anger or joy

and with forty degree weather on the horizon for the rest of the week, i'm hanging on the promise that His mercies are NEW...EVERY morning

EVERY morning when i walk into the school where the scary and unsettling happened, i can KNOW that there is NEW mercy

EVERY morning when i begin a job that i truly love, i can KNOW that i KNOW that i KNOW the promise still stands:  He is making all things NEW

celebrating all the NEW and JOYFUL and HOPEFUL in our lives included our first stroller ride of 2013....still a bit chilly, but a perfect day to dig out our rain boots and go on a hunt for spring

the girls were looking up, down and all around for birds, grass, melting snow....ANYTHING that could signal the end of a long winter and the beginning of all the NEW that we have in Jesus

my little joy hunters

hope seekers

truth chasers

explorers of happy and good

we can sit around and wait for spring

or we can go out and find it...

getting pee my pants excited about one green blade amidst all the brown and dead grass

making a habit of finding cheer, even when....no.....ESPECIALLY when the dark days come

i want these girls to know that joy is not always obvious, but it is always there
most days, finding things to be gloriously happy about is not going to be easy

but getting dirty to find that one thing that whispers Jesus into your heart....is worth it every time

God's Word says that we were made for life abundant

joy overflowing

peace that passes all understanding

i am putting every last one of my eggs in that basket

and hopefully teaching these little chickadees to do the same.

tricky little leprechauns

March 17th has never really been a big deal to me.

My family isn't Irish and I can't think of a single time in my life that I've ever really gotten excited about honoring good old St. Patty.

In fact, J is usually the one to remind me to put some green on.

But this year I decided that it could be just another reason to make a memory....

I had seen some fun ideas on Pinterest, but being 30 plus weeks pregnant, I'm lacking the drive to really attack things like this lately.

So, it needed to be fun and memorable but easy.

I had been building it up by telling Peach that Leprechauns like to play tricks and that those naughty little guys might just try to pull something on us.

At 11:00 last night, I sprinkled a trail of green glitter from the door to the kitchen table, where I left this note.

(remember the look on Tulip's face...it will explain a lot as you continue to read)

Excited for the fun that morning would certainly bring, I snuggled into bed and began dreaming about the delicious breakfast that J had promised to deliver.

An hour later, Tulip was up...letting us and the neighbors know that somethin' was not right.

Fever, cough, runny nose....blagh

I got the vaporizer goin' in her room, smeared her little body with home-made vapo rub and rocked her back to sleep.

Only to be woken up 20 minutes later by more coughing

and that's pretty much how the night went....  

J did his part and took a shift, but really, she just wanted to lay right next to my face and share her germs....lovely.

and let's not forget about that glitter all over the kitchen floor - at various times throughout the night i had to run in there for water re-fills and what began as a cute little trail soon turned into a glitter tornado strewn all over the house....awesome.

real life - it's not pretty, but whatcha' gonna' do?

Peach woke up with a spring in her step and found the letter

She was more than thrilled that we had been chosen by those tricky little guys to be the recipient of a St. Patty's Day prank

I had plans to video tape the whole thing and take pictures.

But, let's be honest.... J and I were fighting through the fog of sleeplessness and we're just lucky that we made it up the stairs and to our coffee mugs in time to see the whole event unfold

Peach took great delight in finding the shoes and collecting her new prizes while shouting out commands to her sister about where she should look - a little preview for what's to come at Easter this year, I'm sure :)

 I think it goes without saying that the morning didn't unfold the way I had planned.

But I'm learning (slowly) that in this mess of life, where plans get diverted and grand schemes are thwarted, the only thing that REALLY ever needs to be organized is my attitude.

The house can be a disaster.

The kids can look less than adorable.

My legs can be unshaven.

My eyebrows un-tweezed.

The dinner can be burned.

The beds unmade.

Everything in my life can smell like pee (and it does).

And my vehicle can look like rodents live in it (maybe they do).

But if I'm joyful, we're okay.

There's a lot of freedom in that.  Only ever one choice away from everything being cool.  It's tougher than it sounds.  But I think I'm getting better and better at it.

So with a big yawn, I'm closing the book on St. Patrick's Day 2013....may the luck o' the Irish bring me a little more energy tomorrow. ;)

snow day

hot dog, hot dog, hot diggity dog!

we have been waiting for today for a looooong time.

like - three years

we got the call at 5 am - snow day - school's cancelled!

WHAT??!?!?

we kind of forgot that snow days exist!

i mean...we always get our hopes up.

but it was three years ago that we got one of these and it's like i tell my students at school - we're minnesotans - we're tough

still...when you get a day like this, right out of the middle of nowhere...a day to throw the schedule out the door and do whatever we please - well, yes, dish me up a snow day, please!

it makes it all the sweeter that BOTH J and I get to be home on days like these - we get the call, smile at each other, roll over and go back to sleep until the littles start their chirping

ahhhh.....what a gift

started the day with cups of coffee and plenty o' stories

then daddy went out to shovel while momma did some cleaning and the petunias called grandpa and ate fruit snacks under the table

some sisterly bonding over the ipad

and then out to enjoy the fluffiness that come when you combine march and minnesota

hallelujah!

we ran around outside until our toes were froze, then headed to a little friend's house (who also happens to have a momma and poppa in the teaching profession...score!)

after our play date, tulip got in on her very first "pizza ranch snow day lunch"

when J and i first moved here, a bunch of our teacher friends got together for lunch at the local pizza ranch one snow day.

we decided then and there that this should be a tradition.

and so it has become

every snow day, we call and text, organizing our pizza ranch rendezvous 

well, three years ago we were a lot smaller bunch

today, we filled up almost half the restaurant with little gremlins

i'm sure the pizza ranch staff were relived when we left :)

we drove home and laughed at the dozens of kids sledding down mountains made from snow plows, just giddy to be given the gift of a day off.

got home just in time for naps....ahhh....nothing better than an unexpected nap in the middle of the week

the snow kept falling...just a beautiful, light tinkle of fluff 

all.day.long.

then J's uncle showed up and the party really started

it's his birthday tomorrow and we had been planning on having him come for supper and cake

he made it in his big truck

and the girls soaked up every minute of his presence in our home

we found some icicles, which are like candy to my children

tulip almost went into trantrum mode when she discovered that eating the coveted icicle is nearly impossible without the necessary opposable thumbs

then daddy came in, riding his white horse, and saved the day by removing the mittens

this is the stuff heroes are made of

after that frosty treat, we headed in for fancy supper, ice cream cake and singing

Peach delighted in giving uncle steve the required fifty three birthday spankings and they enjoyed a few episodes of Tom and Jerry before Uncle Steve had to head home

as if that wasn't enough excitement for one day, Peach wiggled her way into shaving with J

fascinated by daddy's shaving escapades, she managed to convince him to get her  all lathered up and then scraped it off with a popsicle stick

although i'm not looking forward to the craziness of catching up that will be required of me tomorrow, i know that today was a jewel

and i'm definitely ready for spring...but it's march and this stuff can't last much longer

so let the birds start chirping again - sunshine, we are ready for you!  

(but here's hoping we don't have to wait another three years for a day this awesome)