Getting Unstuck is Easier than it Seems

Two seemingly unrelated things happened this week:

Pre.school called to say that Sparkle needed to be picked up and taken to the ER.
I spent a LOT of money on six tickets for international flights.

Lemme' connect the dots for you.

I'm at the very tail end of a 6 year part-time teaching stint.
It has brought such balance to our lives to have me home in the afternoons.
I've really loved it, but I've committed to coming back on staff full time at the middle school next year, so I've been especially mindful of how precious these afternoons at home are as the school year has come to a close.  I was cherishing one of these afternoons, reading stories to the Big Guy and prepping food for supper, when pre.school called to say that Sparkle had a block stuck on her finger.  They'd tried everything they could think of and she was starting to lose circulation.  They thought she needed to be seen at the ER.  I abruptly ended the Big Guy's nap, dropped him off with a friend (I don't need TWO screaming kids at the ER.  One's enough, thanks.) and high-tailed it to pre.school.




She was a champ until I got there and then fear gave way to relief upon seeing me and she lost all composure.  I got her checked in and she made me promise dozens of times that I wouldn't let them cut her finger off.  The doctor took a look and discovered that this thing was not budging.  Our options were to cut the block, which would have required sedating poor Sparkle at this point, or KY Jelly. 

You think I'm joking?
I'm so serious.

We chose the latter and he gently, methodically, patiently, painstakingly massaged in front and behind the block until it moved the tiniest fraction of a centimeter to the left.  Five minutes later, he had worked it just a smidge to the right.  It went on like this for 30 minutes until he had it over her knuckle, the tip of her finger turning completely white.  Ten more minutes of maneuvering and he had it off.

We mentioned that it was pre.school graduation day and he discharged us quick as a wink so we could make it back for the celebration and return that rascal block to its bin in Sparkle's classroom.

A few days later I found some flights to the Dominican.
I bought six.
We're headed back to our beloved orphanage in March.

Both events had me thinking about back when we used to feel stuck.
We wanted to do big things with our family, but we didn't have the time, finances or energy.
Or at least that's what we told ourselves.

Then we started asking ourselves.
Are we really STUCK?
Or are we just choosing to settle for good things instead of the BEST things?
Can we live without cable?

Will my heart keep beating if I don’t buy the trendy new purse that I really want?

Can we survive on a lower Data Plan for our phones?
Can we call our bank and get a savings account set up?
Can we put $100/paycheck into that savings account?
Are we able to navigate the internet?

Will we wake up tomorrow morning if I say no to the stuffed animals with the big glittery eyes at the checkout in our local grocery store?

Will the world keep spinning on its axis if we put the $150 for dandelion removal into a savings account and opt out of a carpet manicured lawn?

The answer to all these things was:  Yes, yes we can and yes we will.
We are resourced.
We are intelligent.
We are breathing.

No excuses.

We can do big things because they are just a bunch of small choices.

The only reason we weren’t doing big things is because it was more comfortable to do what we'd always done and then complain about not having enough time, money and energy to pursue the big stuff.

That's silly.
The TRUTH is:  We do have enough.  We always have.

We live in America and we have the internet.

Couple that with some self discpline and you’re 90% of the way there.

We haven't always managed our abundance in a way that allows us to live up to our dreams.
We've chosen dozens of smaller things, sacrificing the few big ones that really matter to us.

  However, our mindset has shifted over the past few years.

Here's the breakdown of our finances:
mortgage (a lot)
daycare (an equal LOT)
groceries (don't get me started on the fact that these people insist on eating 3 times a day!)
kid activities
adult activities
utilities
gas
phones
...
You get the point.
If we're not careful, we're gonna' come up short at the end of the month.

BUT...
We write our first check of the month to Church.
The next $100 goes to an account called "God's Money" where we save up for big stuff like helping people we love or going somewhere that we can serve.  When we get an opportunity to love, we go GRAND CANYON on it because we’ve got the money, yo!

Then we pay the mortgage and daycare and the rest we FIGURE OUT WITH WHAT IS LEFT.

With this method, we've never, not ONE TIME, come up short.

This does not take a degree or special training or rare talent.  It takes discipline.

I'm gonna' tell you something straight up.
It makes no sense that we've been able to support four kids and two adults on one and a half teacher salaries for the past six years.
It is not fathomable that we have been able to put our kids in every activity they have asked to join.
It makes less sense that we were able to buy a new, bigger home during that time.
It is crazier, still, that we've been able to give a car to someone who needed it, take our kids on multiple trips and have left the country numerous times.

It's the upside down way of the Kingdom of God.
We give, and He gives it back, a good measure, pressed down, overflowing into our laps.

We are never as stuck as we like to dramatize.
We just have to ask ourselves, what is more important, exposing our kids to the world or watching DVR episodes of our favorite shows?
Which do we want more, a golf membership or an opportunity to serve a bunch of awesome kids who live way out on the margin?

We figure out what we need and we give that exact resource away.  When we need money, we donate.  When we need time, we serve.  When we need a friend, we look for opportunities to be one.

And the theory holds one hundred percent of the time:  You can’t out-give God. He already owns it all.

When we tell people that we're taking our kids to paint and sweat and serve an orphanage over next year's spring break, many will misunderstand it.
We've been there before.
For goodness sake, they flogged and crucified Jesus, so who are we to think that we will escape scrutiny?

Hey, it doesn't make a whole lot of sense to offer KY Jelly to a pre.schooler, either.
But sometimes you gotta' just figure it out.


Here's to creativity and to getting unstuck.

Marathon

On Saturday, my kids ran a mile and I ran a marathon.

Sort of....

J was up early at a painting job, and I cheerily woke the children with a reminder that they were participating in the school fun run!

Here's the unfiltered response:

After some...
cajoling,
begging,
pleading,
Justin Timberlake,
kitchen dancing,
and breakfast,
we were all in MUCH better moods.

That is, until it came time to put on shoes.  Only the older two girls were participating in the run, but we had planned to bike to the park, where the festivities were taking place.  The Big Guy couldn't find his tennis shoes and while everyone else laced up, he went in full psycho tantrum mode.

We had been looking for these pesky shoes for a few days, but since the weather had been nice, we'd reverted to sandals, hoping they would show up.  I immediately sent the whole crew on a search party for the missing sneaks.  Twenty minutes later, we'd come up with absolutely nothing.

How can shoes disappear?  I understand hats, gloves, library books, but shoes?  Aren't those attached to your body when you walk into and out of this house?  How could they possibly vanish?

I texted the hubster a quick shot of the scream-fest and his genius reply was,
"Save your sanity.  Go buy him a cheap pair."

We had a few extra minutes.
"Everyone on bikes with helmets, let's go!"
We pedaled to the local Shopko where I found a pair on clearance for $9.
He found a pair for $33.
I don't think I need to explain to you why I didn't engage.
I was alone in a department store with four children.
He weighs 41 pounds.
In the confines of my own home, I will tell him "no" and when he whines, I'll risk the certainty of a chiropractic visit to drag his sorry, screaming, butt to his room all day long.
But in the shoe department?
Nope.  Nah.  No thanks.

This kid is a warrior.  He doesn't back down.  It's going to serve him well someday.  In the meantime, I have to survive raising him, which includes a shrewd, cunning ability to PICK MY BATTLES.
Shoes is not one of them.

Cha-ching.
I walked out of there $33 lighter but my reward was a kid whose smile portrayed the kind of joy you typically see on PowerBall winners' faces.

I justified the splurge by telling myself that the shirt he was wearing
(he has informed us that he will ONLY wear muscle shirts from now on)
cost 25 WHOLE CENTS at a garage sale.

You win some, you lose some.
He's apparently going to be more high maintenance than my girls in the clothing department.
Just, whatever.

We got the snazzy shoes on his feet we were off to the RACES, people.

Look at those smiles.

I'm gonna' call VICTORY for the fact that I was able to turn four sour attitudes (refer to picture #1) into this kind of pre-race enthusiasm.
Go me.

Tulip finished her half mile race screaming, "I didn't even walk one time, mom!!"

Girl, for the love of MOSES, you're almost done.  Just focus.

Peach ran the whole mile, also without stopping, as evidenced by this dramatic finish:

We cheered like it was the Boston Marathon and when it was over, the Big Guy wanted to run the 100 yards from where we were standing to the finish line.  As previously referenced, he's nothing if not persistent, so when the coast was clear I let him loose.  Wouldn't you know, the finish line crew gave him a ribbon for that quick sprint, which totally torked his sisters, who had ACTUALLY EARNED THEIRS.

At this point, the kids were done running, but my "race" had only begun.

We biked home, first stopping at a friend's bake sale.  The Big Guy started getting out of the bike trailer a couple seconds before I had completely stopped, so I ended up running him over.
Awesome.

After I settled that storm, we came home and I found the missing shoes.  OF COURSE, I DID, while not even looking for them, in a closet where I had already searched multiple times, stuffed BEHIND the vacuum cleaner.
Isn't that where you keep yours?

I got over it pretty quickly because now that THIRTY FIVE is quickly becoming one of my identifying numbers (tomorrow!), I just don't have time to care about everything anymore.

We planted flowers and made our porch look pretty.

We had some friends over, took a picnic to the park, played at the waterfall and went to the library.

Let me explain something to you.  When you've been cooped up with below zero temperatures all winter, there is NOTHING that you cannot fit into a beautiful 70 degree spring day.

By the time J got home, he could see I was exhausted in a happy way.  Because he's awesome, he immediately dialed a babysitter and brought me to the winery.

We ate queso, tried new drinks, sat by the fire and laughed like hyenas.
We left far later than is responsible for two people who need to be up with the sun, caring for offspring the next day.

I took my watch off at 11:30 pm and upwards of 32,000 steps were glowing back at me.

Holy Begonias...I didn't run a marathon, but I guess I lived one.

great joy

okay, so i know i just posted about how awesome it is to have a big, huge, chaotic, wild, loud family.

and it is.

i don't take back one single word.

but....

this space was clean three minutes ago.

three minutes!  

you guys.

everyone tells me to enjoy these days.

that i will miss the mess when they are gone.

truth:  i will miss THEM.

i will miss these PEOPLE.

i will miss tiny voices and little bodies.

i will miss they way they smell after a bath and the way they giggle when I tickle them.

i will miss living room dance parties and big bear hugs.

i will miss love notes and enough coloring book pages to wall paper the house.

but, i can guarantee with 100% certainty that i will NOT miss the peanut butter that is smeared all over the back of my couch.  who needs a napkin?  not my kids.  furniture upholstery works juuuuuuuuust fine, yo.

as i'm lamenting the state of my home, gnashing my teeth and scrubbing the couch, there is one thought, just one, in the midst of it all that brings me great joy.

 it is the thought of them being 32 years old, (which will make me 64...the prime of my life!  i am planning to have heaps of energy at this point) and walking into their homes, throwing my sweatshirt on the floor, leaving trash all over their living rooms, stuffing wrappers between their couch cushions, leaving pee in their toilets, smearing my snot across their patio doors, jumping on their beds and leaving the interior of their cars looking like a crime scene as they cart me all over town.

this single thought brings me such gladness.

i promise you, some days it is the thing that GETS ME THROUGH.